Exploration

I was looking at a building as I walked down the street a few days ago and I wondered what it looked like inside. I figure many people have that same thought but I have often tried to answer that question. I will walk inside and ride the elevator and explore the floors which are open to me. I look in utility closets and take stairwells. I examine the art on the walls and try out the furniture. These explorations have led to discoveries of amazing palatial bathrooms with more square footage and finer appointments than my home. I've discovered secret alcoves with wonderful mosaic tile work and a private smoking balcony with amazing chairs and an ashtray that was one of the nicest pieces of design I have seen. Then there are the discoveries of mundane cubicle farms and sad lonely offices with dying plants and photos of disgruntled families on the desk. It is a crap shoot but a fascinating one.I don't just explore urban places I try to explore everywhere I go. When I was in high school a buddy and I would grab a backpack and go on all day hikes along the drainage ditches and canals that ran behind and through the suburban community where we lived. We saw the wild unkempt side of the local country club as well as the tennis pro and one of his students studying more than tennis. We had lunch under a grove of pecan trees that must have been over a hundred years old and that now unfortunately has been bulldozed and replaced with a strip center. We wandered stoned in the dappled sun and reveled in the secret joy of discover. I have a friend that likes to take his boat up the canals that run through Houston and show visitors the downtown skyscrapers from a unique vantage point. They gaze up at the towering buildings as herons fly past and fish splash near by them. Even when I am walking through the grocery store I take time to explore the offerings on the shelves. Vacuum sealed gnocchi and smoked,salty seaweed have been two of my better discoveries. I plan to start sharing my discoveries here and hope that I inspire some of you to do the same.




Text © Crownedstoat – All rights reserved
Allen's Landing photo courtesy of Wikicommons - Scott Ehardt

Laughing at the absurdity

This morning as I rode to work on the Blue Meanie I promised myself I would show a little discretion and control. I managed to make it about 2 miles into my ride when I saw cars taking evasive maneuvers as Captain Arrogance entered the freeway with total disregard for everyone else on the road. Using no signals and cutting vehicles off without regard for safety or courtesy Captain Arrogance was a barracuda amongst the snapper. He sipped his caffeinated beverage and cut off another driver as he entered the fast lane. As I watched him an overwhelming juvenile urge descended on me and I rolled onto the throttle hard. I pulled up beside the $73,000 Porsche Cayenne GTS and as I pulled even I looked over and waved. He glanced over and as he sipped his coffee he floored the throttle to show me what money and Teutonic engineering could accomplish. I believe he really thought that his high dollar panzer could run with the Blue Meanie. I dropped a couple of downshifts to drive the lesson home and showed Captain Arrogance what two wheeled superbike performance was like. I thought that might be the end of it but the Captain was too stubborn for that and he proceeded to cut traffic off in an even more asinine manner. He got stuck behind some traffic I had passed and in his frustration pulled into the lane of a large black Suburban. As I watched events unfold in my mirrors he almost hit the massive American box causing its driver to start chasing him. My juvenile activity had started a multi-vehicle chase on a busy freeway. I decided I would put some distance between myself and Captain Arrogance and his pursuer. Traffic didn't cooperate and as I waited for a hole to run and hide in the red Porsche pulled up next to me and I saw the angry beet-red face of the Captain cursing at me for having the audacity to show up his 400 horsepower SUV. The black Suburban and its red-faced cursing driver pulled along side and horn honking, middle finger flashing and cursing ensued. I took the opportunity to find the elusive hole and disappeared at a high rate of speed. As I rounded a curve and decelerated to a safe and prudent speed, I saw the Porsche driver make a highly illegal lane change and using all of his power rocket away from the Chevy. Unfortunately he did this just as a cop car entered the freeway. Lights flashed and I am betting Captain Arrogance had the pleasure of receiving many tickets and perhaps getting the chance to sample the City's special accommodations. I laughed in relief that I wasn't joining him then I laughed even harder at my own stupid, juvenile behavior. I laughed so hard I cried at the memory of Captain Arrogance red face spewing profanity at me. I'm not proud of my stupid and dangerous behavior. High speed blasts in morning traffic are antisocial and thoughtless and I do not recommend them. I hope as Captain Arrogance was sitting in the City's metal-barred accommodations he came to have the same realization.

Motorcycle Photo and Text © Crownedstoat – All rights reserved
Porsche Cayenne photo courtesy Wikicommons - 3268zauber

Rain and pipes

I am an occasional smoker and it is a vice I practice in careful and controlled moderation. When I started smoking cigarettes thirty years ago I was aware of the risk and so I didn't inhale. That hasn't changed and I have smoked less each year but there is something comforting and wonderful about the taste of smoke in my mouth. A friend told me years ago that for him the sight of his "exposed breath rising to heaven" was one of his secret joys and I heartily agree. I moved from cigarettes to cigars after a short time then fifteen years ago I became a pipe smoker. My grandfather had been a pipe smoker and I recall being fascinated by the pipe racks around his home and the pipes that occupied them. I find pipes to be beautiful works of design as well as practical tools. The tactile sensation of a sand blasted brier or carved meerschaum in my hand as it grows warm from use never looses its appeal. Today is cold and rainy, weather particularly perfect for a pipe. A pipe for me unlike anything else is also an instrument that inspires contemplation. The risk brought on from occasional use seems a fair trade for the pleasures that result.

Photos and Text © Crownedstoat – All rights reserved

70's dining

A few years ago my step mother gave me gift certificate to Steak and Ale for Christmas. I have to admit I didn't give this gift certificate much thought until my friend Alex came into town and he thought it would be amusing to use it. As we pulled into the parking lot a sense of nostalgic happiness flooded over me. Just about every Friday night my family would head out to a restaurant, usually a steakhouse. We mostly ended up at Bonanza but occasionally it would be a Sizzler or a Steak and Ale. As I walked into the door of Steak and Ale with Alex I felt comfortable and relaxed. I looked over at him and saw a big grin come over his face. I asked what he was thinking and he said " it feels like coming home, there is something so familiar about this place". The restaurant was set up as a series of small separate rooms containing four to six tables each. It made for a cozy environment and the thick carpet and low ceiling as well as the heavily textured stucco walls made for a quiet dining experience. The service was attentive and the food was a step above the regular chain fair. There was nothing healthy or light on the menu but we were eating as our fathers had eaten in their prime; Red meat, alcohol, butter, salt and fat dominated the meal. We spent much of the meal talking about our childhood in the seventies and our fathers influence on the men we had become. I subsequently took other friends to the same Steak and Ale and each time they all responded with a sense of happy nostalgia. Everyone also appreciated the quiet atmosphere and professional service.I keep an eye out for sixties and seventies restaurants now and when I find one I check out how they have held up. Usually they have become a little shabby and rundown and almost always I am the youngest patron in the joint. I like that these places don't embrace the loud, excited, "fun" vibe that most modern chains insist on promoting. I understand that a restaurant wants to turn the table quickly and that a hyper, upbeat, loud environment leads to you eating more of their product but it isn't what I look for when I go out to dine. I think our parents were onto something when they dined out and I plan to continue to search out these forgotten icons of unhealthy food choices. Take a look at another example of our dining past:

http://www.sambosphotos.com/


Image courtesy of Sean Davis, Flickr,creative commons license

Your Maserati does 185 but you don't...

Today as I rode the Red Dragon to work I came upon a lovely Maserati Quattroporte looking and sounding like petrol burning sex. As I followed behind I reveled as each electronically controlled shift happened in just 100 milliseconds. It was the sound of Formula One technology on the street. Then as this piece of Italian loveliness came to the first curve the driver reigned the beauty in and parked it in the turn. As I went by I looked to see if the driver had spilled his coffee or dropped a contract and instead I saw a man in desperate need of driving lessons. The road straightened out and I heard the ripping linen sound only an Italian vee eight makes and the black auto went past only to once again be parked at the next bend. I was able to keep the Maserati in sight and watched as it was driven like an aging Detroit land yacht. I am fortunate to live in an area where I come across exotic high performance vehicles on a daily basis and my hope is that all of their drivers and riders will invest in a little track time and some professional instruction. It made me a much better rider and driver and transformed how I thought about every vehicle I use. Here is hoping that the next time I come across Mr Maserati he has a big grin as he cruises sedately on the straights and uses a little more of his chassis's capabilities.


Image courtesy of Tuigh, Flickr,creative commons license

Soft hands

I love simple products that work well. This morning I was washing dishes and as usual I was wearing rubber gloves. This may seem unmanly to you but as I have aged I have come to realize that rough, chapped hands are no ones friend. My friend Xtine is the one that taught me by example that using gloves just makes sense. Xtine used to visit my old house for parties and being the amazing woman she is always insisted after dinner on washing the dishes. She always asked that I have a pair of gloves for her when she did this task and I complied while secretly thinking it was unnecessary. I must have watched her wash a thousand dishes before I saw the light. Xtine is like a sister to me and sometimes like a sister I forget she is smart as a whip. One day I decided to try using the gloves and I was shocked that they made such a difference. I could continue sounding like a commercial but instead I will just say try them for yourself and if you like them thank Xtine.



Image courtesy of Philipp Figueroa, Flickr,creative commons license

Planning, tools and the unexpected

This weekend while installing a cat fence in the back yard I had time to think about tools and proper planning. The cat fence was a prepackaged system that consisted of poly-fencing, plastic-coated chicken-wire fencing, support poles and hardware. I learned a long time ago that I work best when I get properly organized. I like to lay out all the tools that I need for a job as well as all the pieces of a job before proceeding to make a mess of the job. Unfortunately the manufacturer of the cat fencing did not include a list of tools that would be needed for the job nor did they in their instructions fully explain every assembly process to my simple-minded needs. I laid out the tools I thought I would need then added a couple that are always helpful when building things. Since a sledgehammer was required for the job I already had one of those in the group of tools I would need and I added a sharp utility knife as well as safety glasses. Then the fun started as I discovered some of the assembly subsets went just as described while others needed holes drilled in metal poles and caps aligned with something close to precision. This isn't something that I expected to need to do and my battery powered drill wasn't up to the task of drilling multiple holes in metal. My good friend Sebby had come over to help and offered to provide the use of several of his electric drills. After fetching the tools from his place we then proceeded to drill holes and revel at the power that an electrical outlet can provide. The right tool for a job makes all the difference in the world and I went from cursing to laughing at the ease in which the powerful drill pierced the steel tubing. A difficult task became easier and less time consuming. We then proceeded to assemble and install the fencing. It was relatively smooth sailing and there was the pleasure of bashing things with sledgehammers. In the end the cats are now confined to their own Colditz Castle and until they complete their secret glider plans I and the goddess have no fear of them escaping.




Image from the manufacturer
http://www.kittyfence.com/catfencekits.html